.....what will I regret?

So last night I enjoyed my three hour date night with Jesus. At first the thought of an extended Jesus time was just daunting. What would I even do for that long.

Last night I sat on the beach and just watched the waves for awhile. I have been struggling with what it looks like to be crucified with Christ and what it means that my  life is no longer my own.

"I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself up for me." Galatians 2:20

I had been struggling with selfishness and not really wanting to give up my "rights". Yet as I sat on the shore a thought came to my mind. "I should take more pictures." I will never regret taking too many pictures, but I will usually regret not taking enough. Then, I realized that the same was true of my walk with God. I will not get to heaven and say that I did too much for God, but my thought and regret may just be that I didn't do enough. So, that was just a moment where I started to put out lies in my life.

...of whom the world was not worthy...

"Some were torture, refusing to accept release, so that they might rise again to a better life. Others suffered mocking and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment. They were stoned, they were sawn in two, they were killed with the sword. They went about in skins of sheep and goats, destitute, afflicted, mistreated—of whom the world was not worthy—wandering about in deserts and mountains, and in dens and caves of the earth." Hebrews 11:35-38

I came across this passage of scripture recently and was really challenged by it. I am at times so afraid of sharing my faith for the fear of what people will think about me, but I really suffer no fear of being killed, or being sawn in half. the worst censure I could experience is someone telling me to leave them alone or someone's disdain. Another point that hits me is about how these people are described as "of whom the world was not worthy." So often I try to live my life, my Christian life as one that seeks the approval of people first.

Sharing on the boardwalk has been both hard and easy. When I went out sharing with my discipler, I ended getting very disappointed with how few people were on the boardwalk and just the difficulties I was having, but I was able to just be really honest with her about I felt like I just didn't care. I started to pray that the Lord would break my heart, and the last time I went sharing, I found the heartbreaking prayer to be answered. I think that I expected it to be too easy, yet as I had to keep hitting the pavement hearing "no" and "we already did it". A girl Ashley and I did get into two good conversations. Heartbreaking conversations. 

On Friday I went to Atlantic City to celebrate a girls birthday and just got into a great conversation with a girl on the way back. Just about my life and some past hurts. It was really great to just talk to her about them. I am so loved here, authentically. I hope that my wounds from the past are healed in the prescence of Jesus. 

I absolutely loved church once again today! :) I also took part in a theological conversation about covenants lead by one of the staff here, it was seriously great and so thought provoking and intellectually challenging, then I helped make some homemade pizzas, which were delicious!

You are not your own.....

Well, I'm officially employed at Superfresh. So, yeah that's a super-exciting fact. I went back to accept my job that I was offered. I was interviewed at Air Circus, but wasn't called back, so I decided that after taking a drug test for Superfresh, I couldn't turn down a sure thing for prospects.

Then, I hung out on the beach for the entire rest of the day and went swimming and ended up getting pretty sunburned. but, it was fun trying to boogie board.

Then, I had date night with Jesus, where we spend three hours in quiet study. This week is "Setting the Pace" week we talked about what our hearts were running after. "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the holy spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body." 1 Corinthians 6:19-20. I have really been challenged in looking at what it means to live my life as it's not my own and to not give any excuses to God about why i can't follow him right now, etc.  The Lord is working on my heart to not just honor him with only my mouth but with every decision and choice that I'm making, and to feel passionately about Christ and his will. I have been so complacent, i can see that now, I just desire to grow....

Last night we were hanging out on the porch and this couple came onto the porch with a very distinct accent asking if this was a hotel. I immediately noted that it was slightly German, so I got up and asked them where they were from. Who knew that the Lord would speak to my German heart by sending to me a German couple, that I got to speak to in German. :)

"How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him who brings good news, who publishes peace, who brings good news of happiness, who publishes salvation, who says to Zion, "Your God reigns." Isaiah 52:7  

Well, this Minnesotan young adult, namely, me, has finally been on the beach. Saturday we had our first day of outreach. and it was a great time. Honestly, one of the most fulfilling sharing times I think I've ever had. I got to go out with the lovely Mrs. Lauren Pottenger from UCLA and it was really cool to share ideas with explanations and to learn from each other. We ended up spending our entire 1.5 hours talking to two sisters. Their mom came up to us during our survey and was really curious about what we were doing, but then seemed to melt and be excited that we were talking to her daughters about Jesus... she even went as far to give us hugs and kisses.... :) We went through the survey and then the Knowing God Personally booklet, the women were tracking wonderfully, but seemed to continue to answer our questions about salvation with answers about the things we must do, and the works, and a process. 

We got through the entirety, even read the prayer, and we went back to Ephesians 2:8-9 "For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing, it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. When I asked them what grace meant, they gave an answer of "God's love" and I explained to them how it's God's unmerited favor, getting what we don't deserve. Like if you were to speeding and pulled over by a cop. You deserve that ticket. Then the car behind you stops and says, give me your ticket I would love to pay it for you. I always love that reminder of what it is that God through Jesus has done for us.

That night, we had mens/women's time and it was so beautiful to look into all of those women's faces and share our hearts and how the Lord is at work among us.

Sunday was church and I just loved it! Seriously! I know that I annoyed the people next to me because I was so excited by EVERYTHING! The hymns and songs that we were singing. The message was from Haggai and it was cutting, but a really good message to hear. How the children of Israel had forgotten why they had gone back to Jerusalem, and how often do we forget what we're here for. How often do we make excuses for why we aren't following Christ or living passionately for our savior.

Today was the job hunt day, and I'm actually kind of overwhelmed by the prospects I have. I got offered a job at Superfresh, have another prospect at the Promenade food court, and I had an interview at Air Circus, so I'll be taking some time to pray about what the LORD has for me as far as a job goes, and which one I should do or if I should wait for one?

Prayer Requests:

woman time: that I would have good quality one on one time with women here

job: clarity and discernment in choosing

that the Lord would work on my heart and I would fall more and more in Love with Jesus

Praises!

The friends that I've made here.

How the Lord is at work here in OC!

The prospects I have for jobs.

The sweet times with Jesus
  

Here in OC 1

Hey There,

I can't even begin to describe how amazing this thing called "summer project" is. I have only been here for four days, and yet I feel like I've been here for weeks. Relationships here were built pretty much upon walking into the house.

Tuesday: I woke up at 4:15 to head out to the airport with my family and spent quite a bunch of that day in the airport. MSP to Milwaukee, and then to Philly. I ended up sitting behind a girl that is also here on project. We were picked up in Philly and I was pretty much instant friends with the other people that I rode to the OC with!

Upon arriving in OC I was bombarded by so many names and faces and people. Everyone here is so friendly and really really outgoing and real. That has been fun. I share a room with one girl and we have our own bathroom, which is not normal, but we are in the same action groups (discipleship).

Wednesday: We had meetings and then lunch with our impact group where we shared our T&F testimony and flavor! Our impact groups are made up of three action groups. We sat through two seminars at the Ocean City Baptist Church, beautiful thing and awesome place. The Lord cut to me right away. We talked about how we have assured acceptance from Christ and yet!

Thursday:We spend the morning looking for jobs and hanging out on the boardwalk. We spend the afternoon working on the Ambassador and cleaning up and the place looks so much better and is starting to feel so much more like home. Last night, we had a sharing time and it was so great. The LORD has truly done a lot to bring all of us here and I don't think that there isn't a person who doesn't have a story about how God has worked in amazing ways to bring them here.

Friday: Today, we had some training meetings and I got a phone call during one of them, which was embarassing, but it was a potential employer calling me back. So, I need to get back to them, but decided that I would update you all first. Also, we got to meet the original pastor that thought of the idea of OC Summer Project. It was super cute, and really touching. We had game night and played all my favorite 'Kato games and I missed them SO much! But it was fun to play with new people!

Prayer Requests

1) Job, I believe that I have an interview Monday.

2) That the Lord would continue to build us here as an authentic comnmunity.

3) We would be open to the Lord's prompting.

4) Tomorrow is our first day of sharing, so pray that would all go well.

I really enjoy it here, so many fun people who love each other and are funny and I am really enjoying myself! :)

 

 

The Last Post before OC 09 begins

Well Ladies and Gentlemen, the final countdown has begun!

5 days stand between me and the Jersey shore.....

As the day quickly approaches when I shall embark upon this journey, I am filled with many sentiments. I have a full heart, one that is adventurous and looking forward to this day like no other, and yet, I find myself to be nervous with what all this summer will entail, as I think and look ahead, I see that there is still a LOT that I have no idea about for this summer.

Yet, I know that I am meant to go on project. There are just so many things that keep reaffirming me in this. Thanks to all of you for your prayers and best wishes. I know my God is in control and has an experience planned for me this summer that will draw me closer to him.

Then Jesus told his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.²⁵For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. ²⁶For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul? ²⁷ For the Son of Man is going to come with his angels in the glory of his Father, and then he will repay each person according to what he has done.

As weird as it may sound, I cannot wait to learn more of what it means to die to myself and live for Christ!

My address for the summer follows:

Kimberly Nickel

c/o Campus Crusade for Christ

1301 Central Ave

Ocean City, NJ 08226

May, no WAY!

22

The number of days until Ocean City keeps dropping! Unlike these MN temperatures which keep rising. I spent two hours just basking in the sun, it was wonderful! Tomorrow starts finals week here at MSU, which leaves me with anticipation and some reflective sadness. I am in GREAT anticipation of this summer and what the LORD will do in and through my life, but I am also taking a peek at what this year has been. I, as is normal have a few regrets. I wish that I would have been able to be involved in more women's lives here on campus, especially on this floor! I know that I will deeply miss all my friends here and will anticipate seeing them all again! We've spent so much time together the last week, playing games so often. It is a cool summer as most of my close friends have dedicated their summer to the LORD and are going on project. Last week at CRU, the students who are going on project were prayed for, and there are 19 of us, that is a crazy number! 

I can't even wait to see how that will impact us as we head back to campus with the training and the growing we'll go through. 

Prayer Requests:

1) Finish Well: 3 Finals this week! :)

2) A heart that is open to the Lord's working and one that sees opportunities

3) A desire to spend time with the LORD (this has been a little difficult for me with a changing schedule)

4) That I will leave all of my friendships on a good foot and that we would enjoy our last moments together before the summer takes us all around the United States and the world.

Praises:

1) Another well-completed semester of college (only 3 more!)

2) Beautiful sunny days that warm my heart! :)

3) Seeing family very soon!